Dreams Money Can Buy: What Drake Does When He's Not Just Being Drake

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Yes, Drake is to open a strip club next year. It will be in Houston, a city that offered him support early in his career, and will be called ‘The Ballet’. This will, he says, be a “classy” strip club. The rapper launched a “pop-up” version of the venue last night (September 5) and promised it would set the template for the real thing.

“Tonight is a different take on how it should be done in Houston,” he wrote on Instagram. “Treat yourself don’t cheat yourself. Where the women are on a pedestal and the surroundings are unforgettable. There’s a culture out there of dancing and it’s not about no strip club shit. It’s about these amazing women that we’ve got in one spot, the music that we’ve got, and the Houston culture that we got. I just wanna let you know that I’m going to bring it to you in the most honest and genuine way possible.”

Sounds a bit like strip club shit to us, but Drake knows how to run a business: he earned $39.5 million last year. That’s a lot of money, but if you need a sense of perspective, that’s $6.5 million more than Dr. Dre, who owned Beats before selling it to Apple for $3 billion in 2014. Here, then, are the things Drake does when he’s not just being Drake.

When he opened a restaurant

Drake co-owns Frings in Toronto. for the avoidance of doubt, there is a sign above the toilet that proudly reads: “6 Gods”. The restaurant serves a cocktail called ‘Proper Ting’; it’s served in a champagne flute and consists of egg white, black cherry and grenadine, which actually sounds rank, but he must know what he’s doing. In general, the restaurant is, according The Guardian‘s review, “sort of New Orleans meets Europe meets Asia”, which does admittedly sound like the work of a well-travelled man such as Drake.

When he became a tech giant

Well, sort of. Last year, Drake invested in an app called Omni. It sounds totally baffling, to be honest, though he and the app’s boss Thomas McLeod bonded over a shared love of trainers, which must have been nice for them both. Omni is an app for people who are so fabulously rich that they have to keep loads of their excess belongings in storage. Omni collect all your shit, photograph and organise it, then deliver it when you need said shit. Genuinely not sure anyone’s rich enough to need such a totally pointless app, but as we’ve seen, Drake knows how to make mad bank.

When he started a record label

AKA October’s Very Own, usually shortened to OVO, which Drake co-owns with producer Noah ’40’ Shebib. There’s a weekly radio show on Apple Music, which Drake presents, an annual music festival in Toronto, at which Kanye West, Lil Wayne, Outkast and The Weeknd have performed. You know that insufferable meme that says, “You have the same amount of hours in a day as Beyoncé”? You can probably start applying that to Drake.

When he poured his heart and soul into a whiskey endorsement

Virginia Black Whiskey, that’s Drake whiskey. Demonstrating Drake’s knack for bonding with blokes over stuff, he apparently kicked it with the whiskey’s boss Brent Hocking over a shared love of basketball, hip-hop and liquor before inking the deal. Drake loves this whiskey so much, that he flaunted it on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Kimmel. After six glasses of Virginia Black Whiskey, a reviewer for the blog firstwefeast.com wrote: “With my head on the desk, I believe I understand the unique, existential pain of being Aubrey Drake Graham on a deeper, emotional level.” Just to be clear, Aubrey Drake Graham is Drake’s real name. The reviewer hasn’t just completely lost his shit.

When he inspired some hideous gold trainers

Fucking hell, these make Yeezys look subtle. OVO collaborated with Nike on a pair of trainers that came to be called OVO x Air Jordan 10 Retro, which are sort like totally fine, black and hi-topped. Nothing too alarming there. Yet an artist called Matthew Senna then customised the trainers for Drake, making them gold and gaudy as fuck.
Then again, Drake is a man who made more money than Dr. Dre last year. If he likes them – which he seems to, according to his breathless Instagram posts – they are probably, like him, worth their weight in actual gold.

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